Winston Churchill defined a fanatic as, "... one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject." Finley Dunne said, "A fanatic is a man that does what he thinks the Lord would do if He knew the facts of the case."
An activist is at least three steps beyond a fanatic. They are on a crusade for their cause, and nothing, nothing will keep them from completing their quest. Activists see offenders of their cause behind every tree and under every rock.
And when you're an anti-rape activist, who views every male as a rapist, it can be hard to hook up with a guy.
Do I believe rape happens? Yes. Do I believe rapists be punished severely? You betcha. My starting ideas will give you nightmares. The witnesses will be begging for mercy by the time I'm done warming up and ready to get down to business.
Rape is not about sex. It's about power and control. A rapist violates the victims body and psyche. There is no reason or excuse for this.
But what about when the "victim" is actually having a case of "buyer's remorse"? When a person consensually hooks up in a passionate moment, then afterwards worries about what their parents, friends, etc. will say? When "rape" is accused by the "victim" to try and assuage the guilt or deflect responsibility away from them, what are the consequences?. This false accusation will falsely and irrevocably stains the reputation and character of the "attacker" for life, even when they are fully vindicated.
Now I want you to go back and reread the last three paragraphs. Did you see any personal pronouns? "He," "she," his," or "hers?" You didn't, because the sex, biologically or declared of either the rapist or victim has no bearing my position about this. A girl can rape another girl just as savagely as a man could. A girl can rape a man as well. Don't give me "the vast majority" garbage, because when you do, you just re-traumatized that person who was really raped and shattered because you just discounted what happened to them.
So, when you carry yourself and your words imply if not outright declare a man is a rapist for the sole reason he has a penis, don't be surprised that men refuse to have anything to do with you. I have heard the ultra-feminists scream since I came of age in the 70's that "all PIV (penis in vagina) sex is rape." I have heard them say, "All men are rapists. They might not have actually done it, but they are only one erection away from raping a woman."
So when these guys hear about your activism and "you know the chief-of-police," men don't want to be in the same county as you, because he knows with one mistake on his part, or one misinterpreted signal on her part and he is ruined for the next 50 years from a rape accusation.
Be very careful in what you select as a cause and how passionate you are about it. It can have unwanted consequences to you and those around you.